Film to Pen: An Experiment in Fan-Fiction [Spider-Man AU] Chapter 7

 Chapter 7

I come down to the kitchen to find breakfast and am greeted by a very nervous looking Hey. On the tv perching above a kitchen cabinet the news is playing. The perky tv host is gabbing on about Spider-Man and a knot forms in my gut as she say they'll replay the footage of last night's fight. Trying to be casual, and desprately hoping there was a much flashier fight later last night. I get a bowl out of the cupboard and start pouring cereal. My ears burn as I have to relive the humiliation of the previous night again. Apparently somebody was filming just after my ill fated swing all the way to Sandman getting away in the sewer. It's not great quality but it still tears up my insides as they discuss the dangers of trying to be a hero when you're only a kid and how they hope nobody else follows my terrible example. That hurts, I hadn't thought about other kids trying to do it, ones that could really get injured badly from trying to jump to a building. "That was you right?" I jump as Hey whispers in my ear. Glancing around to see if anyone is paying attention, but everybody else is busy getting ready for the day and can barely hear the tv. I nod dejectedly poking at my cereal. "There's sand stuck to the ooze coming out of the broken web shooters," Hey hesitates, I had left them on his work table when I'd gotten back, "Is it like his?". I make a face nodding again. Hey looks kind of sick at that thought, "And it's like him?". Shaking my head I change the subject, " Why green?". He looks blankly at me. "The webs they were green,". 

"Oh yeah I found that something in the green dye stabilizes them, but only if it's added as you shoot. Otherwise it just clogs the hole up and nothing comes out," Hey says. "Right, or when you crack the casing against the wall," I say ruefully. "Or that," he replies. After an long silence puctured by my crunching cereal, he asks "So when are you going to try again?". Groaning I let my face fall in my hands "Not anytime in this life. All I did was add to his reasons for me to stay away from him," I say. "If you look at it that way. Or you just made it obvious he needs to be helping you get ahold of your powers," Hey says trying to make me feel better. But I refuse to be consoled. The first time I've talked to him in six years and I blow it. On the tv an ad starts for a special concert with Great Morning America. Getting excited Hey tugs my braid and says, "It's that ad I was talking about, look!". Rolling my eyes I look and even though it's been almost a decade I find myself recognizing the face on the screen. It's probably just makeup and photo touch-ups, but she doesn't look like a day has gone by. Aside from her hair which is a bunch of short bright red ringlets, instead of wavy auburn brown a shade lighter than mine, she's the same. Same light sprinkling of freckles, wide smile, and deep brown eyes.  Beni's eyes, mine are light blue like Dad's with flecks of yellow Mom called butter flakes. She called butter flakes because the picture on screen is definitely the formally Mary Jane Parker. My face must have been ashen because Mrs. Garcia bustles over and puts a hand on my forehead, "Do you feel alright? You look sick,". Shaking my head I peel my attention off the screen  where words under her face scroll "Mary Jane Watson preforming live songs from the new movie Star of America" and try to give a convincing smile. "I'm fine," I hear myself say but it sounds hollow and far off. Taking mechanical bites of cereal I don't taste, my mind tries to rationalize what I just saw. I always knew my mom could sing. She used to do it all the time, sometimes she'd sing instead of yelling at me and Beni to do some chore for the hundredth time. Although I hadn't known she was an actress too. But I remember her always reading those celebrity magazines with a dreamy look on her face. After she left dad didn't like to talk about it, but I overheard Aunt May say to one of her poker friends "That girl always had her sights on bigger things. Always missing what was right in front of her". I guess she found those bigger things. Hey also noticed my change of mood and sits down in the chair next to me. "What is it now?" he asks. Even though he the only person I've really opened up to I can't put to words what I'm feeling. In fact I don't know how I feel, bitter towards her for leaving yet also a strange ironic happiness that at least she found what she wanted. Instead of having us. Which leads to a surge of anger so strong it shocks me because I think if she hadn't started the leaving in the first place dad wouldn't have sent us away either. Probably, well maybe. At the end of all these emotions I just feel drained. Shaking my head I swallow the last of the milk in my bowl and set it in the sink then head towards the door. Hey follows like a puppy worried it will be left behind, "So what are you going to do now?". Grabbing my backpack I say exasperated, "What can I do? Make things worse, yeah that seems to be all I do,". Hey is quiet, forcing me to look at him out of curiosity. His hands are behind his back and he says, "You know before this I never did anything that could really make difference. My parents are always doing so much for everyone and I'm just the friendless nerd at school. Helping you it felt like I was really doing something. Like maybe I was making a friend too. I get if you don't want to mess up, but don't shut me out. I don't have a lot of friend experience, you gotta help me here,". 

"It's not you," I say ashamed at myself for focusing so much on myself, "I just have alot going through my head before I can think of what the next step is. Give me some time to process and I'll get back to you,". Hey nods, "Just let me know when you're ready," Smiling I impulsively side hug him then run out the door to school. Throughout the school day I was only vaguely aware of the classes. Instead I kept thinking about what I could do and my conversation with Bruce kept coming to mind. If I couldn't force it with my dad, maybe I should try and keep Beni as close as I could. The thought struck me in the middle of pre algebra followed by a thought that made me drop my pencil. Nobody noticed but what came to me made me feel like a beacon of shame. I had been trying so hard to get dad back I was losing Beni. Focusing so hard on what I didn't have I'd overlooked what I did have. Just like my mom when she left. Guilt pummeles my insides like a well placed roundhouse. If I wasn't focusing well on class before then I definitely couldn't after that. By the end of the day I knew what I needed to do. If I wanted to keep Beni I would have to become the model of a well adjusted child in a temporary situation. That would mean no more late night hero practice or parkour trials and a lot more homework. Not just for school, I was always ghosting emails from Ms. Wilt who was my only official link to Beni. If I started shaping up in her eyes she might pass it on to the Smiths who had the final say as to when I got visits with Beni. Maybe I wasn't superhero material, but I could still be a good big sister